Please Define "Legalism"

It turns out that somewhere along the way, I have apparently done something to deserve having the label LEGALIST slapped on me. Do I deserve this? You be the judge.

Our esteemed Mr. Webster defines "legalism" thusly:

strict, literal, or excessive conformity to the law or to a religious or moral code

Elsewhere, the website Christianity.com has this to say:

Legalism exists when people attempt to secure righteousness in God’s sight by good works. Legalists believe that they can earn or merit God’s approval by performing the requirements of the law,” Thomas R. Schreiner said. A legalist believes that their good works and obedience to God affects their salvation. Legalism focuses on God’s laws more than relationship with God. It keeps external laws without a truly submitted heart. And legalism adds human rules to divine laws and treats them as divine...

And here is where I believe common usage of the term has been changed and is being used to whack people over the head. If someone believes the Bible is true, and seeks to order their lives in accordance to their sincerely held beliefs, it doesn't matter that they do have a truly submitted heart. It doesn't matter that the "rules" they are trying to apply to their own lives are not, in fact, "man made" but found entirely in scripture. The very fact that they are following those laws at all somehow justifies being labeled as a legalist.

Are there followers of the Bible who are trying to earn or merit Gods approval? I'm sure there are. But who am I to be the judge, jury, and hangman in this case? And what, for goodness' sake, are they hurting by doing so? Nothing, as far as I can tell - UNLESS they impose their beliefs on others.

So, forget what labels people slap on me. Forget even what Webster or Christianity.com or your next door neighbor says. What did Jesus say? (WDJS?)

If you love Me, you shall guard My commands. - John 14:15

If you guard My commands, you shall stay in My love even as I have guarded My Father’s commands and stay in His love. -John 15:10

You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. - John 15:14

There are about a gazillion more references to keeping God's commands, but we don't have all day here.

It's not about "earning" anything, folks. It's about saying you love someone and acting like you mean it. 

Period.