Elul 22 :: That was then. This is now.

Let me cut right to the chase and totally bypass any of my randomizing:

“Consider how many people you have hurt or wounded in your life. Consider how many times you have acted selfishly, or childishly, to someone else’s hurt. Consider how many times your words have been full of cutting, biting sarcasm and accusation. Are you really so much more righteous than the persons who wounded and offended you? Does it really matter what happened in the past and who or what caused your wounds and scars – or is it better to focus upon the future and your destiny?”

I know that I, for one, spend way too much energy focusing on what happened in the past and how other people wounded or offended me. Me, me, me. 

Someone needs to go back and tell my 12-Year-Old Self, “Buck up, Buttercup! Life is not all about you!”

I hope you can hear that I’m not saying that YHVH doesn’t love us and care about us - each one - individually. You did not hear me say that. I’m not altogether heartless, but I do know what it is like to obsess over a wrong done to me to the point of feeling that I could not possibly forgive.

The point I am trying to make is, nothing that we remember or imagine we have suffered at the hands of any person can compare at all to what Jesus/Yeshua Himself endured at Calvary for our sins. I have to wonder if the wounds that we have experienced from

the mouths and hands of others are just a sly way for the enemy to get us to take our focus off of our own sins and how those sins have been dealt with, once and for all.

Maybe?

Unforgiveness… or “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die” is a quote that has been variously attributed to Buddha, St. Augustine, and Nelson Mandela. (It doesn’t matter who actually said it if it’s true, now does it?) Honestly, I think the bottom line is this:

Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." - Colossians 3:13

In an epiphany I had as I was standing at the kitchen sink washing dishes - pondering the concept of teshuvah (the Hebrew word that we translate as "repent") which means turning and returning... In turning from our wrong choices, we also need to make sure we are returning to the life God has called us to, as His set apart people. It involves taking a look at how Jesus lived His life and taught His followers to live. 

For years I had wrestled with one particularly egregious wrong done to me personally that I just could not bring myself to forgive. And that is when it came to me, or as Smee says in the movie Hook, “I had an apostrophe - lightning has just hit my brain.” I won’t say I heard God speak audibly, but I do believe it was the inner voice of the Holy Spirit reminding me about the clear instruction of Colossians 3:13: “Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

I didn’t have to say what happened was okay. I just had to say “I forgive.” But it was what came next that really surprised me. 

Freedom. 

In the days that followed, I was able to share my story with more people in two weeks than I had done in the previous 60 years. It was as though I had been released from a weight I had been carrying - much like the analogy In John Bunyan’s The Pilgrim's Progress, Christian's "backpack" is a crushing load weighing him down and making him struggle until he is finally freed from his burden when he views the cross of Jesus. 

Jesus didn’t just talk about forgiveness—He embodied it. Even from the cross:

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34

We are called to forgive, too. Jesus is clear: forgiven people are forgiving people.

“Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13

 “If you do not forgive others… your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:15

Forgiveness isn’t about pretending you weren’t hurt. It’s about trusting God with justice—and choosing freedom over bitterness.