2025:: That's a wrap

It's hard to know where to start when the whole year is a blur. I'm sure we went places and did things, saw people and endured the summer heat. All those things are "the usual" of our lives. Honestly, looking back it feels like we were not much more than pachinko balls bouncing from one forgettable pin to the next. If I sound melancholy... well, I guess I am. 

What I know: I had coffee (or lunch) with various friends on various occasions, in mostly diverse locations. If I were to say those times were the highlights of my year, you might be tempted to think I live a pathetic life, but the truth is, all of those times were refreshing, insightful, and reflective. A real opportunity to share my heart and listen to the heart of a friend. A time of honest connection. I believe that if more people sought out those honest connections on a regular basis, our world would be a healthier place.

I know that at one point this year I finally had breakthrough dealing with the after effects of an event that has darkened my life for 60 years. In the space of a month, I was able to speak of it to more people than I have over the previous 60 years and each time I do that, more of the garbage is taken out and my mental and emotional play list is about getting freedom from the lies of the deceiver.

I know that spending time in Scripture is affirming in ways I did not realize it could be. Things that are difficult to navigate become clearer. I am able to turn away from the toxic in some people and learn to be more generous with giving people the benefit of the doubt when their actions do not line up with my thought process.

I know that as much as I love my family - both immediate and extended - I have to lay down my expectations. We are not Ozzie and Harriet. 

I know that as much as I would love to visit many places, the reality is that I do not enjoy the traveling that it takes to get to those places... and I really just do not like leaving home. 

I know that I am blessed beyond measure to have a husband who doesn't always understand me, but who values me, asks my opinion, loves me, and still thinks I'm "beautiful." And this, after 54 years. Yes, I am very aware and very thankful for that fact every single day. (Not only that, he vacuums and does the dishes.)

I know that the very sure prospect of death at some point in time does not overwhelm me. I am, however, enough of a control freak that I have written my own obituary and planned my memorial in advance. Some people find that morbid, but I find it mortifying to have things said about me that are not true. And the truth is, I am probably not the person that most people think I am. I can see it in the raised eyebrow or look of surprise when I make a random statement about my faith or personal beliefs. (That's OK... you don't have to agree with me. For goodness sake, I don't always agree with other people either, but it's always nice when we can have confidence that God is working on each of us in His own time.)

...and with that said, I say adios to 2025. No New Years' resolutions for me, but I am going to try to wrap my brain around adopting this verse for the year 2026: 

Colossians 3:15 - Let the shalom which comes from the Messiah be your heart's decision-maker...

My Roots... and Resulting Branches

I believe that I have mentioned previously that I grew up in the Southern Baptist denomination. (One thing to remember: Southern Baptists in California look and sound vastly different from those you will find in the actual South. And I'm not just talking about a southern drawl.)

As a matter of fact, it is true that I have been "going to church" since the first Sunday I landed on this planet. Growing up, we knew that if the church doors were open, we were to be there. For one thing, my mother was the church secretary for many years after my youngest sibling reached school age until she finally retired. For another thing, we lived in the "heartland" of the California Southern Baptist Convention, and it is no surprise that the majority of my church friends had parents who worked for or were ordained by the SBC. To say our world was "church-centric" would be spot on.

That I met my future husband at a Southern Baptist college should also come as no surprise, but much to everyone's shock and dismay, I did not immediately "walk down the aisle" to move my membership to my new husband's home church the first Sunday after we were married. When my new sister-on-law invited us to visit her church, my in-laws were not best pleased. Do not laugh when I tell you that I had a visit from their pastor within the few few months of our marriage, admonishing me that I was leading my husband astray...

Over the ensuing years, it has been a journey of discovery to note how many things I grew up taking for granted as "truth" were a result of tradition or the SBC heritage, rather than based on Scripture. But first, let me state that I am not one to throw out a tradition just because it does not appear in the Bible. That would be like throwing out Reese's Peanut Butter cups or mochas just because the apostles never had them. That would just be silly. Nor will I claim that I was indoctrinated by some cult and grew up with some wildly heretical point of view. I can honestly say that I believe Baptists got more things right than wrong, at least in my experience/opinion. And - like I said - this is California, not Mississippi or Texas. I can hardly speak for anyone else's experience. 

I can find nothing wrong in teaching children Bible stories, helping them see how those faith lessons can be applied to their own lives, and encouraging young people to think of others first and ask themselves how their actions fit in with being a good Christian witness. These are what I have taken away from growing up in what is commonly known as a conservative denomination. 

What I learned that I had to later unlearn were things like we were the only denomination who "got it right" when it came to how we understood and lived out our faith. The way we baptized (total immersion by water only!), the way we took communion (once a month, soda crackers and grape juice only!), the way we worshipped (don't you be raising your hands! This is not a Pentecostal church!) were just the start. 

But even as I transitioned to attending a different (albeit mainstream) denomination, there were still things being taught that I have since had reason to reconsider and reject as extra-Biblical tradition. Ironically, much of my "re-examining" has been thanks to the teachings and writing of some former Southern Baptist or other so-called "conservative" teachers or pastors. 

Am I saying I now have all the answers? No. I am saying that I have come to a place of being willing to weigh the idea that what I thought was Truth may have just been the result of someone's interpretation, but is not necessarily supported by Scripture. Once I figured out that I had enough basic intelligence to read and study scripture without some theologian or divinity student holding my hand and telling me how I should interpret everything, it was only a short trip to realizing that maybe we have not come up with all the right answers, even after all these years.

So, spoiler alert: I still believe the Bible is true. I still believe God created the universe and everything in it. I still believe Jesus died to set us free from the curse of sin. I have yet to figure out how we arrived at other doctrines that have been handed down through the centuries by various denominations, such as "once saved-always saved", "the Church has replaced Israel", and "the Sabbath is now Sunday - or any day I want to take my rest." 

A few things to think about: Myths we believe