Redefining “Holidays”

 In the past, I used to celebrate the same holidays as everyone else I knew. I did not know any Jewish people, so I did not know about their holidays. I did not know any Muslim people (I did not even know what a “Muslim” was, to be quite honest.) I only just found out about Jehovah’s’ Witnesses and Seventh Day Adventists when I was in high school.

To say I led a sheltered life is probably a cliché, but I honestly was not aware.

Now, as I am older, I have had opportunities to meet different people and explore the fact that not everyone comes to the table with the same plate. And that has given me the gift of being able to examine the things I grew up with so that I could decide if I wanted to keep them for my own.

One of those “things” is the way I celebrate holidays... or even how I define “holidays”. And something I have added to my plate is the celebration of what many people refer to as “Jewish holidays”... when in fact the Bible refers to them in Leviticus 23 as “The Feasts of the Lord.”

I am still learning, and since I am not Jewish, I cannot celebrate them in the same way that a Jewish community might. But that does not mean I can’t learn about their origins and significance and apply them to my life.

This year, I hosted my first Passover. I downloaded a “Messianic Haggadah”, some kosher recipes, cleared the furniture out of our living room, filled it up with banqueting tables, and invited some friends. We had a delightful, meaningful evening... the first of what I hope are more to come.

What I have learned by doing this is that there is a deeper richness to my faith that has still to be explored.

When you grow up in the Evangelical church, you can sometimes tend to miss the “why” behind the “what” in the things you do in life.

Passover 2013

June by Any Other Name

I vaguely remember May, and thinking to myself “soon it will be June and I will be saying, ‘oh wow, it’s June, the year is already half over... where did it go’”, and suddenly it’s July and really, where the heck DID June go??

You know the thing about June being all “Weddings, Grads and Dads”?... well those were wedged in there: June 5th a wedding, followed by hot-footing it to Oregon for a graduation (which, ironically, we endured in a pouring rain), then Father’s Day hot on the heels of graduation, complete with the requisite family BBQs, family reunion and all that.

But what we have that not everyone else can claim is a plethora of June birthdays. Yes, June has now come to overshadow October in the birthday department in our family, and that’s saying a lot. So I officially now have one daughter, three granddaughters, two nieces, and a nephew all celebrating birthdays in June. Throw in a couple more for good friends and anniversaries for a few others... it should not come as a surprise that I barely came up for air in June.

Nevertheless, June got me thinking again about how thankful I am for my wonderful family and amazing friends. Marking these big and small occasions is really just another good excuse to express our love and appreciation for each other, to celebrate the presence of loved ones who enrich our lives.

Unfortunately, nothing brings that into perspective quite so vividly as the loss of even one of those. Sometimes loss comes in the form of death, at other times in the form of a leave-taking. The saddest, I think, is when a loss comes in the form of estrangement. So often, we let pride or insecurities get in the way of maintaining a relationship. “He said/she said; I am right/they are wrong”, cutting someone off because they won’t follow our advice... whatever, and on it goes.

June has traditionally been a month associated with love. According to one source, June is named after the goddess Juno who was considered the goddess of marriage. Not that I am a superstitious person, since I was married in September... but my point is: Life is short, people. Too short sometimes, especially when we have left “I love you” unsaid. Too short to put our differences of opinion ahead of treating others with kindness and dignity, and honoring their humanity. Too short to take sides, or to attempt to gather others to our side against another. This is how you tear down a relationship, not build it up. There will come a day when we will shake our heads and admonish ourselves, what was really so important that it got in the way of my relationship with that person? Are we seriously so insecure in ourselves and our opinions that we cannot allow someone to have a different opinion? Are we so sure that our advice is indeed the best advice for someone, when we don’t even know the entire situation they are dealing with? How arrogant we can be!

To steal some points from Ken Collins, “when we read the phrase ‘love one another’, we immediately think that this commandment is limited to... Christians.”... “‘What Would Jesus Do’ is not a Christian question...rather, we should ask ourselves, ‘What would Jesus command me to do?’...and that consists of loving [others].”

Bottom line, I love my family. It pains me to see the people I love at odds with each other, but I am rather at a loss of how to change anything. I guess it comes back to being responsible for myself, making sure I am doing what I know is right, and loving others in spite of their shortcomings... forgive and hold no grudges. So easy to know what to do... so hard to follow through!